At less than 90 minutes, Liam Neeson's latest action vehicle "Taken" sure doesn't feel like much. Just as we begin to enjoy seeing the usually reserved thespian annihilate everyone in sight, the film comes to a squeaky clean conclusion that, in my mind, hinders its overall credibility. Are we really supposed to believe that he finds his daughter that easily amid a torrential sea of European sex slavery? And why does he only rescue his daughter when the number of hopelessly drug-addled women appears to be growing by the second?
These questions and more swirled around my head as I watched whatever plot there was unfold, but I don't think accuracy is the most important aspect here.
In today's flooded market, it's unrealistic to expect something wholly original every time out, so director Pierre Morel is forgiven for adopting the "high on violence, light on story" philosophy that so many filmmakers cling to. He has crafted a wildly crisp torture flick that doesn't aspire to be anything more and in the wake of characters such as Oskar Schindler and Dr. Alfred Kinsey, it's refreshing to see Neeson unleash the fury.
- *** out of 4
Henry Selick's "Coraline" is the first must-see film of 2009. Adapted from Neil Gaiman's book of the same name, it's a phantasmagorical collage of Burton-esque dreamscapes designed to make you laugh and squirm with equal tenacity. The stunning beauty of Selick's laborious stop-motion animation style is amplified by a 3-D format that is used to enhance the experience rather than serve as a gimmick trying to put people in the seats.
Spry voice work from Dakota Fanning, Teri Hatcher, and Ian McShane (HBO's Deadwood) provides a perfect blend of childlike wonderment and over-the-top wickedness as Coraline descends into an alternate universe full of voluptuous acrobats and other macabre oddballs.
Sure, there are stretches where the narrative slows down and takes on a moralistic sensitivity, but this film is a rare instance in which children and adults can indulge in the surreal without being bored out of their minds.
Now that's a feat!
- *** 1/2 out of 4
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
A-Rod
Another day, another fallen hero in the world of sports. Sure, it was bound to surface sooner or later, but the timing of A-Rod’s latest steroid debacle smells an awful lot like someone’s malevolent attempt at eradicating whatever hope baseball fans had left. Think about it. He was supposed to be the game’s saving grace, the naturally gifted slugger who would eclipse every record in sight and make people forget that Barry Bonds ever put on a uniform.
Instead, he’s destined to become just another anabolically-enhanced mega man who cracked under the pressure and put the game further into a sea of uncertainty and anguish. The fact that the test results were originally said to be anonymous only exacerbates the issue, because once again we have a case where a man’s entire reputation is turned upside down in an effort to sell a few more magazines.
I, for one, can’t blame Sports Illustrated (SI) for breaking the story, because economic fragility has left many periodicals out in the cold and there’s nothing like a juicy exposé to get people buying again. Americans love to revel in the dysfunction of others, especially when those experiencing the meltdown are multi-million dollar athletes with little connection to the common man. What I find distressing about the discovery is the time at which it entered into the public domain. For those out there who haven’t been following, allow me to bring you up to speed.
Former Yankee manager Joe Torre recently released a tell-all book in which he recounts his tenure with the team and how A-Rod was so desperate to be accepted as a “true Yankee” that he developed a “Single White Female” obsession with teammate Derek Jeter. Whether this is true or not doesn’t matter, because the notion is out there and it’s only a matter of time before legend and fact become one and the same. What we do know is that ever since Alex RodrÃguez inked a 10-year, $252 million deal with the Texas Rangers in 2001, he’s been a marked man subject to the type of drama and ridicule usually reserved for the halls of your neighborhood high school. He’s developed a persona as a soft, baby-faced golden boy who cares more about getting inside Madonna’s pants than performing in October, so don’t expect that perception to fade any time soon. Many experts used to believe that if he won a title in New York, the scrutiny would be put to rest, but now I’m not so sure.
SI’s decision to bring the hammer down on one of the greatest players in the history of the game less than a month after the book’s release is strategic marketing at its finest and the nail in the coffin for a player who deserved better. How did it get to this point? How did A-Rod’s name become tangled up with the likes of Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire, and other silver sluggers of the steroid era?
I don’t think we’ll ever know the truth about how everything went down, so the only chance A-Rod has of ameliorating the scandal is to come clean and, for once, not come across as a phony human being.
That’s always been my issue with him. I get the feeling that he’s so cautious in his approach to the media that he tells them what he thinks they want to hear rather than what really needs to be said. His desire to be liked and accepted by the baseball community constantly gets in the way and contributes to the “A-Fraud” mentality that so many sportswriters have adopted. He’s not Barry Bonds and shouldn’t be thrown into the same category.
Speaking of Bonds, how did his actions become tied up with A-Rod to begin with? I realize they both played in the steroid era, but the similarities are few and far between. First of all, Bonds has always been at odds with the media and he carries himself with an air of haughty entitlement that rubs a lot of fans the wrong way. He’s a bastard and he doesn’t care who knows it. Anyone who has read Game of Shadows can attest to that, so it baffles me how people deem A-Rod to be deserving of just as much hate. Deep down, I think he wants people to root for him and doesn’t care to use the media as his own personal puppet show.
As a lifelong Yankee fan, I'm upset that the upcoming season will be engulfed in another cloud of suspicion, because the acquisitions of C.C Sabathia, A.J Burnett, and Mark Teixeira should be at the forefront of discussion. GM Brian Cashman broke the bank in preparation for the new stadium and fans deserve to cheer for a team without wondering about who's currently on the juice.
Recently, MLB Commissioner Bud Selig released a statement condemning A-Rod for his behavior and expressing how he’s sick of everyone blaming the commissioner for what has happened to baseball over the last fifteen years. Okay Bud, whatever you say. You’re the same commissioner who many insiders believe turned a blind eye in the mid-90s as revenues soared and players started crushing the ball at unprecedented rates. You’re the same commissioner responsible for overseeing a 1998 campaign that saw Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa rake 70 and 66 home runs respectively without so much as a hint of investigation. As comedian Denis Leary would say, “Talk about the pot and the f@&^ing kettle!”
Selig is the George W. Bush of baseball. I’m not saying he’s entirely to blame, but how can he possibly deny any responsibility with a straight face? He sat back and allowed owners to profit from the long ball until it became politically incorrect to do so. When he realized the gig was up, he promptly came out to deliver a contrived spiel about the sanctity of records and why performance-enhancing drugs are wrong, but does anybody want to hear excuses at this point? Listening to Selig rant about steroids is like listening to Bush apologize for allowing corporate blowhards to suck the economy dry for the last eight years.
A lost cause indeed.
In the end, all that really matters is the truth and I think that’s what drove SI to run the story. Regardless of how it’s uncovered, the truth is something that will always come back to bite you in the ass, so all A-Rod can do is atone and hope it doesn’t have sharp teeth.
Instead, he’s destined to become just another anabolically-enhanced mega man who cracked under the pressure and put the game further into a sea of uncertainty and anguish. The fact that the test results were originally said to be anonymous only exacerbates the issue, because once again we have a case where a man’s entire reputation is turned upside down in an effort to sell a few more magazines.
I, for one, can’t blame Sports Illustrated (SI) for breaking the story, because economic fragility has left many periodicals out in the cold and there’s nothing like a juicy exposé to get people buying again. Americans love to revel in the dysfunction of others, especially when those experiencing the meltdown are multi-million dollar athletes with little connection to the common man. What I find distressing about the discovery is the time at which it entered into the public domain. For those out there who haven’t been following, allow me to bring you up to speed.
Former Yankee manager Joe Torre recently released a tell-all book in which he recounts his tenure with the team and how A-Rod was so desperate to be accepted as a “true Yankee” that he developed a “Single White Female” obsession with teammate Derek Jeter. Whether this is true or not doesn’t matter, because the notion is out there and it’s only a matter of time before legend and fact become one and the same. What we do know is that ever since Alex RodrÃguez inked a 10-year, $252 million deal with the Texas Rangers in 2001, he’s been a marked man subject to the type of drama and ridicule usually reserved for the halls of your neighborhood high school. He’s developed a persona as a soft, baby-faced golden boy who cares more about getting inside Madonna’s pants than performing in October, so don’t expect that perception to fade any time soon. Many experts used to believe that if he won a title in New York, the scrutiny would be put to rest, but now I’m not so sure.
SI’s decision to bring the hammer down on one of the greatest players in the history of the game less than a month after the book’s release is strategic marketing at its finest and the nail in the coffin for a player who deserved better. How did it get to this point? How did A-Rod’s name become tangled up with the likes of Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire, and other silver sluggers of the steroid era?
I don’t think we’ll ever know the truth about how everything went down, so the only chance A-Rod has of ameliorating the scandal is to come clean and, for once, not come across as a phony human being.
That’s always been my issue with him. I get the feeling that he’s so cautious in his approach to the media that he tells them what he thinks they want to hear rather than what really needs to be said. His desire to be liked and accepted by the baseball community constantly gets in the way and contributes to the “A-Fraud” mentality that so many sportswriters have adopted. He’s not Barry Bonds and shouldn’t be thrown into the same category.
Speaking of Bonds, how did his actions become tied up with A-Rod to begin with? I realize they both played in the steroid era, but the similarities are few and far between. First of all, Bonds has always been at odds with the media and he carries himself with an air of haughty entitlement that rubs a lot of fans the wrong way. He’s a bastard and he doesn’t care who knows it. Anyone who has read Game of Shadows can attest to that, so it baffles me how people deem A-Rod to be deserving of just as much hate. Deep down, I think he wants people to root for him and doesn’t care to use the media as his own personal puppet show.
As a lifelong Yankee fan, I'm upset that the upcoming season will be engulfed in another cloud of suspicion, because the acquisitions of C.C Sabathia, A.J Burnett, and Mark Teixeira should be at the forefront of discussion. GM Brian Cashman broke the bank in preparation for the new stadium and fans deserve to cheer for a team without wondering about who's currently on the juice.
Recently, MLB Commissioner Bud Selig released a statement condemning A-Rod for his behavior and expressing how he’s sick of everyone blaming the commissioner for what has happened to baseball over the last fifteen years. Okay Bud, whatever you say. You’re the same commissioner who many insiders believe turned a blind eye in the mid-90s as revenues soared and players started crushing the ball at unprecedented rates. You’re the same commissioner responsible for overseeing a 1998 campaign that saw Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa rake 70 and 66 home runs respectively without so much as a hint of investigation. As comedian Denis Leary would say, “Talk about the pot and the f@&^ing kettle!”
Selig is the George W. Bush of baseball. I’m not saying he’s entirely to blame, but how can he possibly deny any responsibility with a straight face? He sat back and allowed owners to profit from the long ball until it became politically incorrect to do so. When he realized the gig was up, he promptly came out to deliver a contrived spiel about the sanctity of records and why performance-enhancing drugs are wrong, but does anybody want to hear excuses at this point? Listening to Selig rant about steroids is like listening to Bush apologize for allowing corporate blowhards to suck the economy dry for the last eight years.
A lost cause indeed.
In the end, all that really matters is the truth and I think that’s what drove SI to run the story. Regardless of how it’s uncovered, the truth is something that will always come back to bite you in the ass, so all A-Rod can do is atone and hope it doesn’t have sharp teeth.
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